Something Amazing Happened When I Learned Self-Forgiveness

Have you ever felt that you’re just not good enough? I spent too many years feeling that I wasn’t worthy and I let external factors degrade my self esteem. I had moments where I was brought down to my hands and knees agonizing over my own life choices and the circumstances that I found myself in.

The pain was unbearable and yet somehow I kept slipping back into old habits and bad behaviors.

I was trying to escape from my own potential because I couldn’t bridge the gap between who I thought I was and who I thought I wanted to be.

During the after effects of making mistakes or isolating myself from people who cared about me, I realized that what I was lacking was a higher purpose. Instant gratification from gaming, recreational drugs, and sugar WILL take a toll on you sooner than you realize. When it’s too late, then you will find yourself in rock bottom wishing that you had made better choices.

Rock Bottom is an opportunity take inventory of everything that you have going for you and find a way to rise up again.

I don’t need to be anybody but myself. Who I am is good enough.

I forgave myself for spending my youth playing video games, for smoking weed to escape, and for not asserting myself. I still have to forgive myself for making mistakes or impulsive decisions that detract from my goals in life and I think that’s totally okay because I’m not trying to be perfect. I’m just trying to use my life to have an impact on the world.

Only I can give meaning to my life and it starts by letting go of the things that have weighed me down.

My reality is what I make of it. I’m willing to be uncomfortable if it means that I’m moving forward and making a difference. I’m willing to put myself out there to be judged because I can’t think of anything worse than selfishly holding back on sharing whatever gifts I may have to give. 

Focus on what you can do now.

It’s true that now is all that we ever have. Focus on what you can do now instead of stressing about what you have done. Maybe you just need to understand yourself better so that you can keep yourself in a position of strength and self-control while still allowing yourself to be vulnerable to love.

Maybe you just need to realize your higher purpose…

Is the WORLD Happy With Your Body? (depends who’s asking…)

I think as the story goes, girls want to grow up and marry a charming prince, but boys just want to become a hero.

Little Sally, at four years old enjoys role playing with barbies — it’s the complexity of human social relationships that fascinates her budding mind. She tries to make the barbie look pretty, because she already knows that looks attract.

Owner is only four years old, and already preparing for matrimony.

Owner is only four years old, and already preparing for matrimony.

Next door to her, Jimmy…a five year old boy with propensity to ram toy fire trucks into LEGO’s — demonstrates influence over his environment.

These two young ones will grow into personalities with unique desires and expectations. Despite different strengths and weaknesses, eventually they will all reveal vulnerabilities about their body image.

Why do we have so many preconceptions about how others perceive our physiques?

Truth is that…some people have extra chins, others have veins, cellulite, a little hair — you name it. Some people are just incredibly insecure about their CALVES even…!

Factors influencing beliefs about your body:

  • What you think OTHER PEOPLE feel about your body.
  • What other people ACTUALLY FEEL about your body.
  • Shouldn’t it only matter how YOU FEEL about your body?

I realize that a lot of us aren’t perfect in every way. Welcome to life.

But there’s NO point feeling bad about it!

Especially when a sliver of happiness is an inch away.

Seek life at the head, and take a step forward.

Actually, take lots of steps! (See Getting FIT with Walking) 🙂

My point is that you can implement one healthy habit at a time, and you’ll start feeling better already as you come closer to your body’s full potential.

With results, comes satisfaction.

I think all efforts are boosted by some self-understanding. Pause for a moment, and then ask yourself…what do you really value and what are you going to do to achieve those values?

As a young male, I am consistently exposed to images of masculine avatars. During my adolescence, it was Arnold, Stalone, Baywatch. Now it’s sports stars, pop culture icons, and anything that sells.

But then I realized that we’re not all that different at all. Even though toned beach bodies will remain in syndication for years, you can be sure that each actor has had some certain body insecurity.

It makes NO sense for a top level beach body actor to worry about their body. Just as it makes no sense to WORRY about yourself either. It’s quite human to have vulnerabilities, so why not instead emphasize that which you’re most proud of.

Hasselhoff to crew: Focus on my manly chest, but please dont show my puny calves.

Hasselhoff to crew: "Focus on my manly chest, but please don't show my puny calves."

The TRUTH is that we learn more from success than we do failure. The more success you have, the easier it will be to maintain a healthy weight.

Get off your butt.

Focus on the goal.

And, take it one step at a time.

Physical fitness supports all aspects of social and personal life. Whether you want to be a sports hero, or meet your prince charming, I’m with you for the journey.

But right now, I must visit my local gym, Bally’s Total Fitness, to train my body closer to its full potential.

Until the next time, my friend…

CNN — why we eat too much, and how to get control