Dear Fitness Santa,
Have I been naughty or nice?
If my blood sugar level surpasses the pre-diabetic levels, will you put coal in my stocking?
Let’s just forget about my brother’s triple layer homemade pumpkin cheesecake I ate on Thanksgiving — I swear it was a special occasion!
If I’ve been good, then you should know what I want for Christmas this year.
My Fittmas Wishes for 2010
Santa, if you are really true, then you will help me get these Christmas wishes.
1. Health for my friends and family
They are good people, I promise…even though they may occasionally carbo-load on a regular basis.
I realize their pancreas’ may be working overtime to secrete insulin, so my Christmas wish is that you improve the Insulin Sensitivity of all of my friends and family. This way, they will be able to enjoy carbs better, to utilize to energy from carbs, and to not gain weight as fast.
2. Extra protection for my Central Nervous System
Because I am an addict of strength and total body power, I engage in strength exercises as HEAVY as possible for only a single repetition. This taxes my body and causes significant Oxidative Stress to my Central Nervous System.
In order for me to prevent disease and continue to strengthen the neural connections between mind and muscle, I ask that you give my battle hardened nerves an extra boost going into the new year.
3. Give me the Fat of my Friends so I can burn it off for them.
I can seriously eat the worst tasting foods in the world if I can realize the benefits of it. Even some of the healthiest people I know are not even willing to consume foods like the sticky, stringy, bitter fermented Natto soybeans.
As long as I can maintain my skin elasticity, I will take your fat and burn it or find some way to make sustainable energy to slow down Global Warming (err..I mean Climate Change).
4. Give Justin Beiber a hamburger
Kid needs to eat.
5. Collectively lower the world population’s Homocysteine levels
A customer jokingly asked how I know about all this “Bullsh*t” and its because I read a lot. Homocysteine is a real threat within every person if levels are constantly elevated.
Elevated levels of homocysteine are a marker of inflammation and oxidative damage in the body. Even worse, the higher the homocysteine levels, the greater risk of cardiac events.
Santa, it saddens me to see 30-40 year old open-heart surgery patients who have been weakened by disease of lifestyle. Please supply significant methyl-donor molecules, which can re-methylize homocysteine and protect the structures of our mortal human bodies.
6. Reform the Farm Bill, which may be responsible for Diabetes in America
What does the Farm Bill mean to you? It means that you can walk into any grocery store and purchase processed foods containing High Fructose Corn Syrup at an artificially low price.
The Farm Bill supplies Corn farmers with BILLIONS of dollars just so that they continue to produce corn in massive quantities. In fact, corn would not really be profitable for the farmers without YOUR tax dollars artificially increasing the demand for corn.
Scientists and people-without-your-best-interest-in-mind who wear lab coats are constantly finding ways to process corn into “products” (food items) that consumers can purchase at a low cost.
These food items contain NEGATIVE nutritional value, but they taste good. High Fructose Corn Syrup stimulates the reward section of our brains at a very fast rate, but it does NOT affect satiety.
So Americans just want more and more and more, and they CAN GET MORE, because the price is artificially decreased.
Reform the Farm Bill with both HEALTH and ECONOMY at the heart of the issue.
Then, Santa, Americans can move forward together in health.
7. All Restaurants should supply Digestive Enzyme supplements with meals
Capsules containing plant based enzymes can make a world of difference when it comes to digestive health and nutritional absorption of meals.
Amylase – carbohydrate digesting enzyme
Protease – protein digesting enzyme
Lipase – fat digesting enzyme
A 10-cent capsule containing these enzymes prior to meals at restaurants can not only prevent cases of bloating and gas, but also improve the absorption of nutrients entering the body.
When chunks of food aren’t able to be digested well enough, the food can putrefy and have a toxic effect on the body. For example, when someone eats Steak and an hour later gets horrible disgusting nasty gas, that is a signal from your body that the digestive system is compromised and therefore the immune system is taxed in order to detoxify it.
Enzymes before meals can promote a healthy digestive and immune system, even after a heavy steak meal.
8. Nutrition courses should be a Requirement for EVERY Institution and Industry!
If it is truly our goal in this country to prevent disease and be well, then we need to align our goals with our actions.
There are not enough resources available to the typical consumer — which is a reason why blogs like this gain popularity. Health matters.
9. Help me Show Americans the benefits of Fermented Foods
I realize Santa, that since I don’t have an appendix anymore… I no longer have a “reservoir” of beneficial bacteria in my body. Which is why if I get sick or experience significant dysbiosis (bacterial imbalance), then I can only cure myself by consuming Pre and ProBiotic foods.
Fermented Foods are the foods with the most living activity. They provide life because they are living. Fermented foods like Yogurt, Kefir, Kim Chi, Natto, etc. have a huge array of proven physiological benefits on the body.
This Probiotic Blog post is one of the most popular posts I’ve ever written
I wonder how many cases of cancer we could prevent by eating two bites of Kimchi before dinner.
Even though it is super health, Santa, please don’t put any KimChi in my stocking.
10. I wish that EVERYONE becomes an Herbalist!
I used to think Herbs had little effect on the body…except for “certain” herbs.
But now I know better.
Herbs are similar to food.
Lots of herbs contain vitamins and minerals just like food. But what makes an herb so special is that it often has a specific “phytonutrient” or “phytochemical” which helps the herb grow and survive in its ecological environment. These PHYTONUTRIENTS have beneficial effects on the human body.
For example, Milk Thistle helps the detoxification process of the human liver.
Dandelion will make you pee, and your Kidneys will love it.
Arjuna lowers blood pressure and your gets your heart happy.
Ginger kills H. Pylori the bacteria responsible for ulcers and also puts an end to nausea (I gotta take ginger if my step-dad is driving).
The list goes on.
Herbs are for real, and everyone should be an herbalist.
Santa, if you are truly real, please help me promote Wellness in the world.
I am nice, and sometimes naughty, but I care for my people and you do too.
Lets make this Christmas a good one. Let’s bring awareness to the self and confidence from within.
Merry Christmas to one and to all.
Perhaps there is a little Fitness Santa in all of us.